Mark 3: 31-35 and Psalm 130 were the texts for the service (copied below)
We talk often enough about belonging to a church. Whitehouse Presbyterian is an excellent example. We belong also to bowling clubs and book clubs. We belong
to our families. But the most important place we can belong is with Jesus. And so
in our gospel story, with his biological family standing patiently in the
doorway, Jesus issues his invitation to any who would follow him. Come be a
part of my family, come and find belonging, with me. This invitation in no way diminishes
the bond that Jesus has with his DNA-related mother and little brothers. I hope
not. I have an adopted brother, and when we gave him a place to belong, in a
family, as a Massey, I do not feel that it diminished or devalued my connection
with the rest of my biological family. In fact the opposite, I think Jesus’
invitation acknowledges that part of being human, is a profound need to belong,
to be loved as a sister, brother, parent, child. That place of belonging is an
invaluable gift, which God promises to provide.
Psychologists have identified this “need to belong” as
a universal component of human life. I read an overview of a study that
explores this part of our nature, and two things stood out:
1. "People readily form relationships with others without being paid or forced to do so, and do so even under adverse circumstances. For example, infants and children will form attachments to others even though they have little or no knowledge of their social world and are incapable of calculating benefits or costs to these relationships."
I think that this
eagerness to be in relationship, before it was a human behavior, was a divine
behavior. Exemplified by the trinity, but also felt deeply in our hearts.
2. "When we
feel close to others, our thoughts change such that a cognitive “merging”
effect occurs; people begin to include aspects of their
relationship partner in their own self-concept. The boundaries
between individual partners break down in relationships, and people think of
their own fate as being intertwined with the fate of others."
When we are in a
relationship or a community, we are no longer just ourselves. We cannot help
but think of our family and friends as a part of who we are, and God feels the
same way about us.
But before I talk about God, let me talk about dogs.
Human behaviors and intentions are very complex to talk about and understand.
Dogs, not as much. Looking again in the field of psychology, we know that pets can help us find belonging. People with pets are less likely to feel lonely, or
rejected, and are more likely to feel socially fulfilled, happy, and healthy. When
we are with our pets we know that we are loved, that their love is freely
given, and we begin to identify with them. They are ours, and we are theirs.
I had a roommate whose mother trained therapy animals.
Dogs, bunnies, ferrets, therapy animals can have demonstrably transformative
effects for people young and old with anxiety, depression, autism, and
countless other health challenges. Dr. Aubrey Fine, from California, offers a story
of a 5-year-old girl who refused to speak to anybody outside her family, and
recoiled in fright from strangers. She was afraid to build new friendship, in
contrast to the innate urges we have heard about. It was a dog named Puppy that
provided the bridge that set the girl and her doctor on the road to recovery. As
she was petting the dog, the doctor gave it a signal to move away, and then she
explained to the young girl that all she had to do to make the dog come back
was to say “Puppy, come here.” So she spoke to the dog, out loud, in front of a
stranger, and the dog quickly returned. This incident provided a foundation for
treatment; the girl felt the affection of the dog, the warmth of the new
relationship, and it gave her the courage to speak, and be open to new friendships.
All of this demonstrates something we already know well.
Loneliness is an unnatural-feeling and painful experience for human beings. We
need to belong, and to feel loved. Our pets, in all of their simplicity,
provide this by simply loving. And the love of God is deeper still, and more
transformative. So now we must consider, what does it mean to find belonging
with Jesus?
Irish Poet and scholar John O’Donohue, in his book on Celtic
Spirituality (Anam Cara), describes the transformative power of love:
“When we love and allow our selves to be loved, we
begin more and more to inhabit the kingdom of the eternal. Fear changes into
courage, emptiness becomes plenitude and distance becomes intimacy.”
Courage, Plenitude, intimacy, these are the
characteristics of life with Christ. We trust in the promise of God’s
transformative love, and our souls smile to hear Jesus call us his brothers and
sisters.
The psalmist also has great hope in this promise, writing “Out
of the depths I cry to you, O Lord!” we can guess perhaps, out of the depths of
loneliness, regret, sinfulness. But, as the writer says, with the Lord there is
forgiveness. With the Lord there is steadfast love and the power to redeem. God
transports us from the swirling chaos to a place of belonging, which we
desperately long for.
Belonging with Christ transforms our hearts with the
knowledge that we are loved, but also directs us to follow the will of God. Being
a disciple of Jesus is not the price of belonging. We do not purchase God’s
love by acting rightly, just as we do not purchase the love of our mothers or
our dogs. We care for them and do ask they ask of us because they are part of
who we are, and that relationship is part of our identity. I will remind you of
the research I mentioned earlier, which tells us that “People readily form relationships with others without
being paid or forced to do so.” And “people begin to include aspects of their
relationship partner in their own self-concept. The boundaries
between individual partners break down in relationships”
We do not talk enough
about the tender relationship that Jesus shared with his disciples. First he
called them into fellowship with him, and not because they had acted righteously.
As far as I can tell they represent a random cross-section of first-century Palestinian
Jews. But Jesus wanted to share his life with people, so he brought them close,
and made his home with them. He loved his disciples like family and asked them
to support him in his ministry. He washed their feet, he told them the truth,
and confided in them as he approached the cross. By then, the disciples felt
they had no identity apart from Jesus, and the thought of living without him
was terrifying to them. And so Jesus promised that the Spirit would enter them
and be with them forever, and so thereafter they tirelessly did God’s work with
courage, with plenitude, and with intimacy, the hallmarks of a life that
belongs with God.
And so we have faith
that God loves and forgives readily, with no payment from us. But we recognize
that when Jesus calls us into belonging with him, it is not just about enjoying
the emotional fulfillment of God’s love. We are with Jesus in joy and eternal
life, but we are also with Jesus in his defense of poor and marginalised
people; we are with Jesus in his challenge to racist, classist, patriarchal,
and imperial power dynamics, we are with Jesus in his boundless forgiveness, in
his sacrifice, and we are with Jesus in his affection for the least of these. We
belong, with Jesus in God’s kingdom here and now.
Mark 3: 31-35
Then his mother and his brothers came; and standing
outside, they sent to him and called him. A crowd was sitting around him; and
they said to him, “Your mother and your brothers and sisters are outside,
asking for you.” And he replied, “Who are my mother and my brothers?” And
looking at those who sat around him, he said, “here are my mother and my
brothers! Whoever does the will of God is my
brother and sister and mother.”
Out
of the depths I cry to you, O Lord,
Lord,
hear my voice
Let
your ears be attentive
To
the voice of my supplications
Lord,
who could stand?
But
there is forgiveness with you,
So
that you may be revered.
And
in his word I hope;
My
soul waits for the Lord,
More
than those who watch for the morning, more than those who watch for the
morning.
For
with the Lord there is steadfast love,
And
with him is great power to redeem.
It
is he who will redeem Israel from all its iniquities.
Will, I will be working Whitehouse Presbytery this upcoming year. I was wondering what your email address is, would love to talk to you about what I can expect and what your experience has been like. My email is llfrym09@gmail.com.
ReplyDelete- Leif Frymire